Today is Wednesday, half way through the week. But for me its just starting; I'm flying solo as of this morning. It's been awhile, but as a truckers wife it's a fact of life, or a fact of the job. Luckily it rarely happens now that he switch 'hauls'.
I try to vent my emotions into something profitable, like cleaning. It's usually short-lived, but it works. Today was our cleaning day, tomorrow we are baking sugar/gingerbread cookies (and more cleaning), and Friday my dear sis-in-laws are bringing their kids over and we're all going to decorate them, (the cookies that is). Which makes me wonder why I mopped the floors today? ;) But even though I'll clean the entire time... you won't notice, mostly because you won't be able to tell.. the joys of being a mom :) 'cleaning your house while your kids are still growing, is like shoveling the walk before it stops snowing'
Everyone is affected: him, me, the kids.. We all try our best to downplay the effect it has on us, but the kids pick up on everything. Thankfully, today has gone by fairly well. I was surprised how well the kids got along. Besides a snag at nap time they've done well, which helps mommy more than they'll ever know. But just wait until Friday or Saturday! Until you've been alone its hard to explain. And I'm not talking about being alone all day loong with your kids. We've been there, done that. I'm not saying its easy, because it isn't. But it's completely different to be alone ALL day and ALL night, and then repeat the next day, and the next day and the next.
For those worried, I'm not technically alone. My in-laws live near by, like a 1/4 mile from us and the 'other' Heather (family) live through the woods.. So within a few minutes I have help.. which I've needed to use a time or two! But I've realized as hard as it is for me to be at home with 4 little kids, its no piece of cake for him either. I tend to think I have it the worst, but he is gone from home, his wife and his kids... on the road, alone. Thank goodness for camera phones. He loves getting pictures of the kids, and the kids get a kick out of his pictures (his semi, some silly thing he saw that day, etc) It keeps up together, even when we're miles apart.
I better wrap this up, it will just get sappier (is that a word?) I should have posted a warning at the beginning of this post.. reader beware Sap Ahead ;). Also, I don't write on here to get sympathy or 'praises' for what I do, go through, write about... I write to clear my head, vent, and so much more I can't even begin to describe. Like I said before, this is like a journal of mine, that I'm sharing publicly, (for now). I can not guarantee it will make sense, or even be worth while to read, except to me. But it is real, honest, and from the heart. G'nite.